Wednesday 18 December 2019

Faster Than A Speeding Salad I Mean Bullet

Can not face making one more lunch so go to work with nothing.

Order $30 superfood salad for delivery which will come to approx 37 cents per kale leaf and 11 cents per pomegranate seed but worth every penny.

Order superfood right to my office door with suite number in the address and the notes.

Watch Delivery Guy pick up food and drive it to my office on the app.

Message: I am here.

Walk to office door.

He is not here.

Message Delivery Guy. You are not here. I am at the office and I don't see you. 

No answer.

Get a message on the app: Delivery Guy tried to contact you and you did not respond. Your order will be cancelled.

WHAT? No way! 

(What's worse than paying $30 for a delivery salad? Paying $30 for an undelivered delivery salad!)

Call Delivery Guy 850 times. He does not pick up. 

Write on app: Where are you? I am here and I don't see you.

He does not respond.

Meanwhile, timer is ticking down on message Your order will be cancelled.

On app, can see car in front of building but looks like car is still moving.

Maybe he is in the office lobby.

Take elevator downstairs and lobby is completely empty. Ask security and they have seen nothing resembling a  $30 superfood salad or a Delivery Guy.

Walk outside of building which is on very busy corner plus it's freezing to see if can identify Delivery Guy. Nope.

Go back on elevator, back to office, maybe I missed him.

Nope.

Call and message a few more times. Nothing.

Finally get message on app. I am here.

Ok, I write back. DO NOT MOVE. I will be right down to lobby to get superfood which at this point I am hoping comes with superpowers because I may need them. I am about 90 seconds away from Order will be cancelled. 

Back on elevator, back down to lobby, back outside in balmy Montreal December.

Delivery runs across the street and hands me the bag. Sorry About That. He says. I got a ticket from the cops.

(Oh man, it is really not his day)

Here are my issues:
  1. I'm sorry he got a ticket
  2. No one asked him to park illegally or make an illegal u-turn 
  3. (In other words Who Knows Why he got a ticket)
  4. (However of course I still feel badly for him, but I don't feel responsible)
Still it was wrong of him to report me as unresponsive when he was the one being non-responsive.

Grab salad, take elevator back up to office, open app and tell them what happened.

Ten minutes later, response: We are sorry your superfood salad was not delivered. We are refunding your order completely. 

Here are my issues:
  1. I didn't say the order was cancelled, I said he was about to cancel me
  2. I don't deserve a full refund, I am three kale leaves away from finishing the damn thing
  3. (However if you aren't going to read  my complaint correctly I can't be held responsible)
  4. (So thank you for picking up the tab)
In conclusion:
It's ok to feel badly for someone (like the driver getting a ticket) without feeling responsible for his actions. And, it's ok to report someone for something they did wrong (like saying I was not responsive and they should cancel my order) if there's a $30 salad at stake - or anything else that is dear to your heart. And, if you report the situation accurately and that moves someone to refund you completely, then it's ok to put the money in your virtual pocket and walk away. You can use it to buy another salad next week.



2 comments:

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  2. Excellent point. I felt the same way when Avis did more or less this to me, and accepted the extra refund as compensation for all the hoops I had to jump through for them to actually respond to my complaint.
    Feeling bad and feeling badly are not the same thing. If you feel bad, you have a feeling that is not good. If you feel badly you are actually doing it wrong - the adverb modifies "feel", which means you are saying that you're incompetent at feeling. If you see what I mean.

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