Last Summer, In Italy

Waiter comes to the table.

We have grilled salmon with gnocchi, fettucini or spaghetti. We have bistecca romana with fettucini, or gnocchi.

Can I substitute spaghetti for the fettucini?

Yes of course. We also have shrimps, very nice, split open and grilled with a side of rice.

Can I substitute fettucini for the rice?

Yes of course. We also have chicken breast sautéed with sundried tomatoes, plum tomatoes and tomato ragu, on a bed of broccolini.

Can I substitute orchiette for the for the broccolini?

Yes of course. Finally, we have roasted pork, very tender, falls off the bone and that is served with fettucini or spaghetti.

Can I substitute bucatini for the spaghetti?

Of course.

What is this last special here?

Oh yes, of course. We also have donkey, braised for twelve hours and served with gnocchi.

Hmmm.

Orders placed, food eaten, faces wiped, napkins crumpled.

My shrimp was delicious, C says. But I wish I had ordered the donkey.

Really? Because I thought it sounded vile and in fact thought the waiter was joking Really? Why didn't you?

Are you kidding? And eat the gnocchi. Gross.