In The Immortal Words of The Clash

Thursday Lunchtime

Much instability at work over past few weeks has led to fork in the road.

Can remain clinging to last roof shingle as water floods the bayou, or can leap off burning building and land in temporary safety net that has a couple of holes.

Neither option perfect.

Give self 48 hours to make a decision.

Friday Night

10 year old daughter T. comes home from evening out with BFF, BFF’s mother, grandmother, grandfather and two sisters.

How was your evening?

It was fun Mom except for the part when we forgot little sister E in the car.

FORGOT E IN THE CAR? What do you mean?

Well we all got out, and we were focusing so much on the grandpa and the grandma and making sure they were ok by the time we walked to the restaurant we realized that E was still in the car.

Isn’t E five years old?

Yeah. So anyway we all walked back to the car to get her and she was sitting there crying hysterically.

Really?

Yeah. And Mom what I don’t get is why wouldn’t she just get out of the car? If you forgot me, Mom, I would just undo my seat belt, open the door and yell HELLLO YOU FORGOT ABOUT ME. Or I would just run down the sidewalk to get you. Or, if it was a really sketchy neighborhood and I was scared I would honk the horn so you would come back. You had to see it Mom she was just sitting there crying.

(Beaming proudly): You are so right, T. Because that’s how I raised you. We are not the types to sit around and wait for someone to rescue us. We take action. We make things happen.

Lesson 1: If we are stuck in a car, we open the door and get out. We do not wait for someone to come and rescue us.

Saturday Morning

Beautiful Bar Mitzvah with the worst acoustics in the city. People talking during services, microphones not used, much background noise.

Rabbi opens his mouth to speak, complete silence blankets pews.

Rabbi just returned from mission to Poland and Israel.

Rabbi recalls the horrors of the concentration camps, the trains that brought Jews to their death, the showers that killed the Jews, the mass graves where they buried the Jews and the acres and acres of Jewish shoes and hair that are still on display to commemorate aforementioned atrocities.

Trip then went to Israel where Rabbi says the most inspirational sites were the shopping malls. The vineyards, the grocery stores and Aroma coffee fill the Rabbi with joy.

Not what we were expecting. 

He explains:

That a community can withstand a trauma like the Holocaust and go on to build such coffee stores that give you a free piece of chocolate such beauty is inspiring beyond any pile of rocks with someone’s name on it any memorial.

It is the drama – he says – of leaving a gut wrenching site of destruction and landing where Jews are selling t-shirts to other Jews that makes us buoy with hope.

Lessons 2, 3, 4:

2. Entire families perished in the Holocaust, I have no real problems.

2a. If you are a good speaker, you don’t need a microphone.

3. Jews are good at retail naturally resilient.

4. There is beauty in rebirth.

Sunday, Late Afternoon

Invited out for I’s birthday to restaurant that is completely pitch black.

It will be fun, she says. We will eat in dark, drink in dark and apparently it’s so dark that your eyes don’t adjust.

Sounds fabulous. I hope they have fondue.

Last time this couple picked the restaurant it was All-You-Can-Eat fish cheeks and braised offal. Blindness re-enactment has to be a step up.

Get to restaurant in pouring rain with rock bottom expectations and even less make up (no way am I putting face on to sit in the dark).

Turns out that you walk into brightly lit bar area where you can order drinks, put your phone and valuables in a locker (oh, that’s true, pickpockets probably love it here) and gawk at people who mistakenly thought it was all going to be dark and they didn’t need to wear lipstick.

You also look at menu and order before you go in.

Beet salad.

Stuffed shells. Steak sliced and drizzled. Roast chicken. Fall off the bone ribs.

And oh look How Perfect Is This.

Surprise option.

So you are eating in the dark and you will not know what you are eating.

You can order surprise app, main, and dessert. 

That’s for me.

Are you kidding? Husband asks. You said this was the worst idea anyone ever had  you weren’t excited about coming here and now you are ordering the Surprise option.

I don’t know if I will ever come back to this restaurant, I say. So I want to make sure that I get the full experience while I’m here. I’m not usually afraid to try new things except fish cheeks and braised offal. So why should this be any different. You know me, when I’m in, I’m all in.

Lesson 5: When I’m in, I’m all in.

Monday morning

Review lessons learned this weekend (including lesson 2a, not sure if you noticed, I threw it in as a freebie):

1. If we are stuck in a car, we open the door and get out.

2. Entire families perished in the Holocaust, I have no real problems.

2a. If you are a good speaker, you don’t need a microphone.

3. Jews are good at retail naturally resilient.

4. There is beauty in rebirth.

5. When I’m in, I’m all in.

Ladies and Gentlemen, looks like the decision is clear.

Let go of roof shingle.

Close my eyes.

And Jump.

Wish me luck.