Sunday, 25 December 2016

Because 007 Was Already Taken

Ordering in from Vegan Restaurant for Vegan Son (read back story here)

Vegan Son wants Vegan Brownie.

Vegan Brownie from this Vegan Restaurant renowned in Vegan World but not on take out menu.

Order food online and click on halva sesame cookie and chocolate chip-ish cookie.

Put note with order saying if you have any Vegan Brownies please send and we will pay vegan driver.

Vegan Restaurant calls. We have Vegan Brownies but we can't send them to you because you didn't click to add them to your basket.

Can you add them to my basket now?

No I'm sorry that would be impossible.

You can add them to my tab and I will pay the vegan driver when he or she or they gets here.

No I'm sorry that would be impossible. You need to add brownie to your basket yourself.

Hang up phone and tell Vegan Son he is out of luck.

Vegan Son says Mom. Seriously. You have gotten way more complex blood out of way more stubborn stones. Please.

Ok fine. Will try harder.

Call Vegan Restaurant back. Is there any way at all I can get a Vegan Brownie for my Vegan Son.

Well, you would have to log back onto menu and create a new order.

But minimum order is $15.

Yes.

So I would have to order $15 worth of Vegan Brownies? (Which by the way is like 2.5 brownies. Vegan Lifestyle costs lots of Vegan Money. Hence the term Greenbacks. Just kidding. Click here for origin of word).

Yes.

Ok fine. Vegan Son is worth it. Look through menu and can't find Vegan Brownies anywhere.

I see them right here.

Really? Where?

Scroll down to desserts. See where it says Double Trouble Cookie?

Yes.

That's actually a brownie.

Complaint Lessons Learned:

1. Vegan Brownie being pursued by undercover vegan operatives so must go undercover as a cookie.
2. Vegan Brownie part of Brownie independence movement and must be added to basket by itself.
3. Vegan Brownie refuses to be delivered by car because of drilling in the Arctic (or is it Antarctic?)
4. Vegan Brownie is actually delicious.


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