Sunday, 29 June 2014

First Rule of Comedy: Timing

I want to visit Bubbie before I go to camp says 13 year old G.

Me too says 9 year old T. I love Bubbie.

Bubbie is in what appears to be one of the final stages of Alzheimer's Disease.  Communication and mobility are sporadic but somehow she is still able to have a relationship with her grandchildren who hold her hand, play 80s music for her, and even get her to dance a little.

Kids took bus to the best long term care centre in Canada visit Bubbie yesterday and I agreed to drive them home.

I am so relieved says T getting in the car. She wasn't in her wheelchair, she smiled and she ate really well.

Yeah and it was so funny. Two residents were eating supper and one fell asleep.   Then the one guy made sure no one was looking and stole dessert from the other lady and ate it and put the dish back on her tray before anyone noticed says G cracking up.

Get home in time to shower and change and meet other set of grandparents at restaurant for Friday-night-pre-camp-and-Florida-cousin-in-town dinner.

T asks for crayons.

Waitress forgets.

T asks for crayons again.

Waitress says: Oh must be my Alzheimer's acting up.  Smacks her head.

Ha ha ha. We all laughed politely.

I'm lying.  No one laughed. And no one was politely.

T looks at me, mouth open, eyes big.

I return the look.

Is that even allowed? T asks. Is that a thing? How can she be allowed to be a waitress and say things like that?

I don't know sweetie.  I just don't know.

Things We Could Have Said To The Waitress:

1.  Ooooh you should have that checked. I just saw online that the first sign of Alzheimer's is forgetting to bring crayons with the kids menu.

2.  Funny you should say that. My mother has Alzheimer's and I find these jokes absolutely hilarious.

3.  Alzheimer's? Are you sure it's not a brain tumour?

4.  Smack your head.  Good idea.  That will probably cure your Alzheimer's in no time.

1 comment:

  1. Amy I LOVE to read what you have to say. I always laugh. Usually out loud. This one made me sad, though. Knowing first hand about the impacts of dementia on a family, and that it sure can affect the "sense of humour". Glad I wasn't at dinner with you (not that you invited me), because I mightn't have held back when the waitress smacked her head. Might have suggested she hit the other side, too, just to even it out. Wonder if her Alzheimer's is cured yet.

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